We should all be ready more Andy Borowitz

BUSH REFUSES TO SET TIMETABLE FOR WITHDRAWAL FROM CRAWFORD
Early End to Vacation Would ‘Send Terrible Signal,’ President Says

President George W. Bush said today that he understands and respects the views of those who are calling for him to cut short his summer vacation, but warned that an immediate withdrawal from Crawford, Texas would “send a terrible signal to the enemy.”

“The enemy would like nothing better than to see me cut short my vacation and get back to the White House,” Mr. Bush told reporters. “They hate my freedom.”